From challenge comes change
Mrs Janet Stewart | stewartj@mbc.qld.edu.au
Last week we celebrated International Women’s Day at MBC with a breakfast and keynote presentation from ultramarathon runner and mental health advocate, Jacqui Bell. The event was a sell-out in these COVID normal times, and we were privileged to hear Jacqui share her powerful message of grit and resilience. She told the story of a girl destined to succeed in the world of Tennis, only to find herself managing depression, anxiety, and drug addiction. After an attack in Bali which led to gruesome injuries and two weeks in the hospital, Jacqui was determined to turn her pain into a higher purpose, and she found strength in facing her fears headfirst, so turning a personal crisis into a significant opportunity. Jacqui spoke of how she harnessed the power of setting goals and discovering her purpose, as tools to overcome adversity and to build her resilience. Challenge certainly brought great change in her life. Jacqui is now the youngest person in the world to run an ultra-marathon on all 7 continents and is a proud ambassador for the White Cloud Foundation – having raised over $25,000 for mental health awareness.
In Week 6, I was also privileged to celebrate the life of another determined and impressive woman, at the memorial service for Margaret Hill – MBC ‘old girl’ and ex-member of the MBC Board of Governors. Margaret Hill (nee Rogers) attended MBC as a boarder from the age of 6 and was a proud student of the College. After travelling post school, she took up a role in Ansett Airlines and held some very senior roles in the company for 40 years. Yet, her love for MBC never left her and she dedicated 26 years to the Old Girls’ Association and 10 years in the role of a Governor; in the latter role she was involved in moving the College to its current site on the Wondall Road campus. In his eulogy Mr Waller, ex-Headmaster, spoke of a woman who faced obstacles with courage and hope and a formidable spirit. She was a woman not afraid to challenge the status quo and we at MBC are in her debt.
Each year, International Women's Day also marks a call to action; and this year its theme #choose to challenge seems particularly significant. In the last two weeks the media has highlighted the alarming and disturbing extent of peer-on-peer sexual assault in school aged children across the nation. A petition started by former Kambala student Chanel Contos, unveiled hundreds of former Sydney schoolgirls’ allegations of sexual assault at the hands of their male peers. Since then, more than 4000 graphic allegations of sexual assault have been shared and this outpouring of testimonies across the nation must surely be the fuel for us all to empathise with victims and question why this occurs in our society. It is time for us all to challenge such behaviour to ensure that collectively we bring about cultural and structural change.
At MBC there is much done to educate our students about consent, but like all schools we constantly review our programmes, and know we can and should do more. What is clear however, is that we cannot do this alone; it is only together, as a community, that we can ensure greater understanding of consent and so affect change in attitudes. Consent is just one aspect of kindness, empathy, and respectful relationships and we all need to have more direct, unambiguous conversations and statements about consent. Parents also need to start having conversations around consent sooner rather than later, as some teens experience their first sexual encounter well before the subject matter is discussed. It is not enough for parents or carers to assume that your teenager knows or understands what consent means and the implications surrounding it. It is important for them to learn about boundaries to enable them to respect themselves and their partners. A Special Report has been prepared by SchoolTV in response to this issue and offers parents guidance around normalising the topic of consent to ensure your teenager experiences healthy and respectful relationships. The link is below, along with a resource we use at MBC, which is a more light-hearted but very effective comparison of sexual consent to making someone a cup of tea. https://schooltv.me/wellbeing_news/special-report-conversation-consent
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZwvrxVavnQ
It is clear as adults we must teach and role model respectful relationships to the children and adolescents around us. Our Positive Behaviours Policy and Procedures is a document which endeavours to guide us all on how to interact with courtesy, respect, and kindness and how to resolve conflict or tension in an appropriate and restorative manner. Briony Scott - Principal Of Wenona School in Sydney - put this beautifully last week in an article in the Sydney Morning Herald;
“Young people learn by watching. They look for cues as to how to behave in situations where they have little experience. They listen to the words, they watch the finger pointing, and they know what behaviour is validated, and what behaviour is ignored. They learn how to be good people by watching adults and learning what matters.”
Moreover, at MBC we talk about consent every year, and it is well covered in subjects like our Positive Minds Programme in secondary and in health and physical education. We have guest speakers (Bri Lee, Michelle Hill, Paul Dillon and we are about to welcome Melinda Tankard Resist later this month), who are specialists in discussing consent in our sexualised world. By Year 12, we have explored sexual violence, domestic violence, and pornography. Only last week, our Deputy Head of Secondary (Students) addressed this current debate in an assembly presentation. (Click here) Thus, may I encourage all of our parents to have age-appropriate conversations about sex and sexuality with your daughters; these are fundamentally important topics. If we, together in partnership, do not teach our students about respectful relationships, sex, and sexuality then the mainstream media and the internet will.
The young women coming forward have shown incredible courage, and are rightly demanding action, for behaviours which have no place in our world today. They need our support.
Gloria Steinem, world-renowned feminist, journalist and activist said, "The story of women's struggle for equality belongs to no single feminist, nor to any one organization, but to the collective efforts of all who care about human rights."
We are all challenged by this recent debate on consent and collectively, we all have a role to play to change this world into a better, fairer, and more inclusive place. There is urgent work to do.
